FOG HORN

It’s a new year and 2022 is in the history books as we look forward to 2023. I hope you’ve all had a great Holiday Season. The last two years have been challenging at best, and as we embark on a new year, I hope it will bring us all happiness and prosperity. We may even get a Speaker of the House appoint before year’s end.

If you’ve made it through 2021 and 2022 without seeing a therapist is because you’ve had shoot the shits. For readers new to the site, thank you for visiting and let me tell you what a shoot the shit is.

A shoot the shit is a social interaction between a group of friends, colleagues or family members during which any topic can be discussed. The participants don’t need to know anything about the subject, are free to make any unsupported comment, use uncensored profanity, insult anyone they wish or altogether change the subject. The benefits of having regular shoot the shits are immeasurable and have greater efficacy than a $150+ per hour session with a jackass who majored in psychology so they could understand themselves.

So, in my first shoot the shit of 2023 I venture into the very delicate topic of virginity and can a woman get pregnant despite being a virgin. Throughout my post I use clinical terminology avoiding vulgarity, for the most part. So, let’s get started.

Anthropological scholars estimate that the concept of virginity was conceptualized around 5,000 to 10,000 years ago; along the same period when the North America ice cap was melting to create the Great Lakes (interesting that the planet was warming in the absence of internal combustion engines and fossil fuels?) Sadly, the concept of virginity was primarily imposed on women.

Virginity became so important during the 14th century that devices were contrived to keep women from engaging in premarital and extramarital sex. Historians believe the emphasis on virginity came from the belief that Mary, the mother of Jesus, was herself a virgin and impregnated by divine intervention. Throughout history, numerous religious sects have disputed that belief and the Jewish community all agreed that Mary was  schtupped. Much of the emphasis on virginity was advanced by the Roman Catholic Church; a bewildering position considering that the Catholic Church was founded around the teachings of a Jew and its first Pope Peter, who was also a Jew. One example of its link to Judaism is that Roman Catholics celebrate the circumcision of Christ. Further evidence is the church’s magnificence of décor, apparel, and art treasures.

So, is it possible that a virgin can be impregnated by other than divine intervention? The answer is in the hymen.

The hymen is an often-misunderstood component of the female anatomy, and its presence has traditionally been associated with virginity. Marrying a virgin was prized and a source of immense pride; something to crow about. Men aspired to marry a virgin, particularly true in countries where Catholicism had a major influence. That belief overlooked that a spouse possessed two additional orifices, so your virgin spouse may have been servicing the fleet by means other than vaginal intercourse.

Another misunderstanding surrounding the hymen is the belief that it completely seals the vaginal entry. The normal and healthy hymen only partially covers access to the vagina because there needs to be a way for a virgin female to menstruate. Were the hymen to completely cover the vaginal opening, menstruation products of blood and tissue would accumulate in the vagina resulting in disease, and a permeating acrid aroma assaulting any surrounding olfactory senses. Such a hymen is referred to as imperforate hymen and requires medical attention.

In contrast the normal healthy hymen may be a crescentic variation such as shown above. allowing for uninterrupted menstruation. So, how does pregnancy occur as a virgin?

Normal sperm densities range from fifteen million to more than two hundred million sperm cells per milliliter of semen, and the average male ejaculation is 2-5 milliliters. It only takes a single sperm cell to fertilize the female egg. So, any direct stimulation causing ejaculation outside the vagina, often considered to be effective in preventing pregnancy, can enter via the vaginal opening without piercing the hymen thus preserving virginity.

So, can a virgin be pregnant? Yes, she can.

I hope my 2023 kickoff shoot the shit was informative and that it will inspire you to schedule your own shoot the shits, it’s more effective than a therapist and better than social media. Have a great weekend!